When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
