Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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