he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
