Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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