so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He better not be in your backpack
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
