; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
