Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
