i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
