I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
