Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
