thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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