we're blogging at a bar
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
