guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Life is so much better after having sex.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
