Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
