wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
