And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
