He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
