Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
