I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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