ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
