Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
