does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Sober January is a disaster.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
