why didn't you poke me back
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
