Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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