Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
