On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
