I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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