I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
