do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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