if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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