Michael Bay diarrhea
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize