I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
how does that bad decision feel?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
