You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
