OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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