Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Quick, to the slutcave!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
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