your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize