How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
