addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I deserve to be covered in dicks
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
