Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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