I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
