her vagine was all disorganized.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
