how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
