gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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