you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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