i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
