I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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