THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
