Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Randomize
