I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
