somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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